First Birthdays, traditional outfits and our mother's love language.

In Fijian culture, traditional outfits are not just clothing—they are a powerful expression of heritage, pride, and connection to one’s roots. These garments are rich in symbolism, each thread weaving a story of our ancestors and the deep connection to the land, the sea, and the spirits that guide us. One of the most significant elements in Fijian attire is tapa, a handwoven bark cloth that carries centuries of cultural importance. Traditionally, tapa is not just made for daily use but is often gifted to mark important life events, symbolizing love, respect, and the bonds between individuals and communities.

I used to be that child that dreaded having to pack traditional gifts (mostly Tapa and mats) from my mother to bring to Australia. They took up a lot of baggage space and because they were not regularly used, required care when storing during the year.

During the COVID-19 pandemic, when travel restrictions prevented us from gathering with family to celebrate our girl’s first birthday, we found solace in the power of tradition. Despite the distance, the warmth of our culture and family remained close. As part of our celebration, we dressed our one-year-old in a beautiful traditional outfit, one that had been passed down to us by our mother. This special garment, a piece of our history, helped create a deep connection to our roots and brought a sense of closeness, even when separated by miles.

The act of dressing our child in the traditional attire gifted to us by our mother was not just about celebrating a milestone. It was a way to honour the cultural totems and practices that have shaped our identity. It was about maintaining that delicate balance between preserving our heritage and adapting to the modern world. In a time when physical presence and family gatherings were impossible, the symbolic act of donning our cultural attire made the day feel not only special but deeply meaningful. It was a reminder that no matter the distance or circumstances, our culture, love, and traditions are always with us.

As we navigate the complexities of the modern world, it’s important to appreciate the beauty of cultural totems—whether through the gifting of tapa or the wearing of traditional clothing. These practices are reminders of who we are, where we come from, and the values that shape our lives. While times change, our traditions provide a grounding force, offering a sense of continuity and connection to the past.

Though we were physically apart from our extended family during the one-year old’s first birthday, the experience highlighted the resilience of family bonds. It showed that even in isolation, our cultural heritage could bring us together in spirit, allowing us to create lasting memories that transcended time and distance.

I now have a renewed sense of appreciation for my mother’s love language.